Darkness....turns to Light!

My first memory of today was trying to bribe a male Filipino nurse.  I wanted water.  Badly.  My final offer was 500 Dirhams (approximately $136) for just a little piece of ice on my tongue, but he would not budge.  Jerk.

I knew I was lying down flat on my back, and everything was bright--glaringly bright--white.  Then I was wheeled around for a bit, turning corners here and there, as I watched the ceiling scenery change from white plaster to neon lights to the stainless-steel elevator innards.  Eventually, I reached my final destination:  one medium-sized room with oak furniture and a massive window.  After hooking me up to machines and IVs, Nurse Jack-Ass-No-Ice left the room and I suddenly realized I was not alone.  Scott (one of my neighbors) and the Spaniard were flanking my white hospital bed.

Now, I could easily add bells and whistles to my description of today's events, and you would be none the wiser, because I would be lying if I told you that the actual details are not unclear.  Nevertheless, I have decided to take the honest route and describe today exactly how I remember it, and I'll save any embellishments* for the "book".

So...where was I?  Oh, well, here's what I remember, in no particular chronological order:  

• I remember looking at the clock and reading 8:30.  As in 8:30 in the A.M.  And I realized that the last time I saw a clock, around the same time that my memories fade, was at 10:30 pm the previous night.
• Scott and the Spaniard were here.  And they looked tired and stressed and nervous and worried, and all I could think was, "What's wrong with these guys?" 
• Scott told me that he had called my parents, waking them up in the middle of their night in Georgia, to inform them that, "Your daughter was in an accident.  She's paralyzed from the waist down."--Hold the phone--what did he just say?  Oh yeah, I think I knew that.   
•  I was so proud of my neck brace, I asked Scott to take a picture of me to e-mail to my dad.  He tried to argue me out of it, because I suppose it probably wasn't the nicest thing to send to a potentially devastated parent 8,000 miles away with feeling of utter helplessness, but in my drugged-out, bump-on-the-head euphoria, I thought it was the most fantastically clever idea ever!  (And sure enough, my dad later told me it made him feel a bit better to see me in such high spirits).
• I called my two closest girlfriends.  First, Taryn, who didn't answer her phone, and then I called her sister Abby, and when she answered I proceeded to tell her that I had broken my back and was in the hospital.  She freaked out and told me that she and Taryn would come over as soon as possible.
• My doctor, Dr. Shaban, came to see me.  He said there was no need for the neck brace anymore.  I don't remember what else he said.  He looks like Santa Claus.
• Abby and Taryn came to visit.  I asked Taryn to take a picture of me, which I posted on my Facebook page as my new profile photo with the accompanying Status:  "Tiffany is in the hospital with a broken back.  Really."
• I have the biggest shiner on my left eye that you have ever seen.  I think things are rattling inside my head.
• My neighbors came by later in the afternoon to visit, because it seems they needed to sleep in a bit after the long night I had put them through. 

Now I know you're sitting there scratching your heads, wondering what the hell is going on, wondering what happened, dying to know the details!!!  So that is why I have saved the weirdest part for last.  You see, lying in that hospital bed all day, I knew why I was here, but I just didn't remember how I knew. I knew how I got here, but I didn't really remember how I knew....Yes, I do realize this makes absolutely no sense, so I will try to explain. I suppose because I had been physically awake through the entire course of the night's events, I was aware of what was happening. It wasn't like in the movies or on soap operas, when the perfectly-coiffed damsel in distress awakens to the sounds of beeping machines, manicured hand gripped firmly by a red-eyed hunk, and asks in a weak voice, "Where am I? What happened?" Because, for some reason, I already knew...but now I just don't remember.  One word:  Concussion (trying to ignore the fact that it's probably safe to say, "Three words:  Concussion and Tequila," but I think, "One word:  Concussion" has a nicer ring to it!).

Anyway, I do realize that you all are desperate to know the details, and so am I!  And I promise, we will get some answers in the next blog post!

*truthful details, events, and/or information that have been gathered through thorough research and interviews with all parties involved, as opposed to my simply making things up for a more interesting and entertaining story.